Must A Aspiring Content Creator Friend Cease Using Me for Material?

The Prosecution: One Friend's Perspective

At times I'm recorded while having a meal. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it’s like a sudden shock.

My best friend of 10 years, she, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, her motto is, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when strangers see her performing for the camera – I get secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but she is trying to be. She creates vlogs about living in our city, a day in her life, and her styling career. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes I'm captured while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her feed later, and it comes like a surprise: I’ll have no makeup on, making a strange expression or photographed mid-bite. It feels invasive.

Marielle also expects me to record her at inconvenient times. Often I’ll be talking to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has transformed into me being her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my discomfort about the situation, she dismissed it. I've been invited to several industry functions, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the time and effort I spend assisting her create material.

I’m grateful that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don’t feel she’s fake or inauthentic, but sometimes I feel that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me smiling with another. It feels forced. It's crucial her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I enjoy being with her, but I also desire to experience it without being filmed, altered, or posted for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: Marielle

I hope Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a hobby; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online enables me to express myself and connect with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to generate income from your passions. I admire people on TikTok who pull off that aesthetic of informal, self-made content creation.

Content creation is my version of engaging with life: observing the nuances, posting them with an audience that appreciates the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uneasy. Bringing her to industry events was my method of sharing opportunities, providing her a chance to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her career in design too. That isn't leverage, it’s just being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see what the content we make together can achieve: an opening. I know not everyone likes being filmed, but sometimes unplanned moments is what makes material genuine. Appearing on video occasionally is an inherent aspect of being my friend. I'd remove anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my private filmmaker, but friends help each other in small ways. I thought filming a clip here or there would be fun for her. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having my friend around makes endeavors lively and pleasurable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I value our friendship deeply and don’t want content creation to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to find middle ground: like asking before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly content creation is not a replacement for real connection: it's merely part of how I experience life and I want her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop recording herself and her friend when they are out together?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion film you. I understand that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Perhaps she can find influencer friends to collaborate with. With the dark, looming future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, you can’t ask your friends for help every time, even if they have helped previously. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn't imply all those around her is content. She needs to honor Beth’s personal space.
Another reader, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and displaying her life publicly, but it’s not for everyone. It’s nice she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to listen to what her friend desires.
A commenter, 27

It seems like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your friendship. Foster some authentic memories, where true emotions are preserved, not online archives. In fact, celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more secrecy than it appears.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she's on the job. Both seem unsure as to what’s reasonable. The answer is not found in trying to change one another, but in each establishing clear boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been over-exposing their bond?